Pancreatitis Disease

For me, probably the worst thing about having pancreatitis is the uncertainty.  Even though I have been hospitalized 13 times now with Acute Pancreatitis, the doctors are still uncertain as to what it is that causes the attacks.

At this point they seem to think that it is a genetic abnormality or possibly a “perfect storm” of conditions that combine to push my chronic pancreatitis into an acute attack.

Because of this I am left with this cloud that hovers over me.  I know, and feel the chronic pancreatitis that is always with me.  Some days it hurts more and some less but it’s always there, just under the horizon.

But after I have an acute attack it’s like there is a clock that starts counting down again, ticking of the minutes and hours until I have another acute attack.

We have changed the meds that I take and I have changed my diet to try and find one that is kinder to my pancreas.  But every day that goes by it’s like a ticking time bomb.  I know that it is likely just a matter of time until I have another acute attack and the more time that passes the higher my stress level is.

Every time that I feel the pain start to raise I am afraid that this one is going to go into an acute attack.  I know that the stress of the worry is just as bad for my pancreas as some of the other factors but I can’t help but get worried.